Another beginning to another week. So far so good. Simon's sleeping right now and as I look up at the monitor, his heart rate is 98. I'm thinking about how in a few years I will be helping him understand double versus single digit numbers as we're getting into basic math at school. I also think about how just a few minutes ago I drew up 5 different medications that I subsequently inserted into his feeding tube.
It still blows my mind that this is my experience with motherhood. Quite different from what I imagined and I wasn't even spending a lot of time imagining anything because I knew that there's nothing like it.
My sister once said that having Maya was like having your heart walk around outside of your body. Yeah, I feel like that a lot. I love this little person so much I don't quite understand it.
This morning there was a little bump/dip on the roller coaster ride with Simon not having his regular two naps and having a much harder time going to sleep when he was obviously tired. It was hard to suss out whether or not he was just going through a growth spurt moment of fussiness (and maybe not even needing three naps a day anymore) or was there something heart related going on. Not clear just yet, but he's wearing a heart monitor halter for 24 hours so we can monitor that and I'm not worrying too much since he had a great 2+ hour nap this afternoon and as noted before his heart rate is right where it needs to be right now.
It wasn't an easy morning but both Simon and I seem to be recovering quicker from the bumps and dips.
We had a lovely walk with Auntie Dre this evening and even got to wear the same outfit all day for lack of major spit-ups. Nice.
I still don't know what to wear to our Hospital Wedding. I might try on my tux to see if these child bearing hips will fit it but otherwise will need something to at least try and match Jaime in all her splendor.
Simon's tux onesie is too cute. We'll post photos for sure.
Security said that it wouldn't be a problem to have some folks come in as long as we were staying on the 2nd floor so we just need to run it by the Social Worker to get it ok'd. If we were to open it up we need folks to know that
A) We would need to be clear that it's just for the wedding and Shimmy couldn't hang out for very long after the ceremony
and
B) We would need to ask that if folks did come by that they not touch Simon (as frikkin' adorable as he might be) so as not to overload the little man with germs and/or stimulation.
We would start right at 4pm on Sunday the 19th. How many people would be interested in coming? Email me directly at lafitch@gmail.com so we know how many cookies to have on hand.
Crazy.
Love to all
LF
2 comments:
Today was a funny day. Not so much ha, ha, more eaaaaaaaaaaaaagh
ha.
So Maya is totally fine. AND. This morning she had a very bad fall, couldn't stand very well, was dizzy walking (like dizzy bat girl for those of you familiar, or kinda like a drunkard for those of you not), and then threw up. So we took her to the ER. We were only there for two hours, and by the end of it she was making friends with all the doctors and nurses and using all her wiles to get us to GO HOME. I had this moment though, of feeling like my heart, that yes, it often outside my chest, was being boiled. Possibly in oil. And I immediately thought of you two and my sweet Simon.
You know Fitch, I've known you all your life, and I sometimes wonder who you will be after all this.
You both are so strong and brave and sweet and loving.
Having gotten (such a small) taste of what life is like with a child in the hospital I am amazed that you are able to be as great as you are. I am convinced I would be a much bigger bitch than both of you combined.
Love love love you
Jen
PS Maya is really just fine.
PPS I had a dream about Simon disco dancing last night. I asked him where he learned it, and he just laughed at me.
Happy (6 month) Birthday, Simon! We all hope you have a great day ~
Love,
Carol, Pat and Katie
(Z and Cecelia, too!)
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