Monday, October 20, 2008

Paper Thin

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Yesterday was wonderful. Exhausting and wonderful. We came upstairs after a really nice dinner with family post wedding and were washing our hands when a message came over the loudspeaker that a patient was coding in the main room of the ICU. It was the first time that we'd heard such an announcement and it was a powerful reminder of where we were. Yes, we had just had a wonderful ceremony and gathering downstairs. We'd had cookies and juice and friends surrounding us. Shimmy looked magnificent in his tux onesie.
And, we still reside in the intensive care unit at Childrens' hospital. The folks that our here (including us) are children and babies that are very sick. Not just sick but critically ill, on that line, sometimes moving one way or the other.
We've been here long enough that the nurses share with us when it's been a rough night/day or not and it wasn't until this morning that we learned that not only did the patient not survive but it was a friend and neighbor that we'd had in the Annex just a few weeks ago. One of the most beautiful little girls I'd ever met. Another cardiac patient who had been in out of the hospital since she was born. Her mom was considering going back to school for nursing since she was doing so well and while she was here we talked about how much we'd learned about medical care (what prompted her interest in nursing school and what makes me never want to be a nurse except for my own son). She borrowed some of Simon's toys and even walked them back herself when she was done with them.
We saw her mom as we were heading out to our wedding. We smiled and said "Hi" knowing that our little friend was back for a routine surgery.
Yuri died last night after an unexpected complication and I am feeling unbelievable grief. She was a force of life and a study in beauty personified. My heart is with her mother right now whose experience I cannot imagine even as close as I've come to it. Please send a prayer out to whatever god/dess or gods or forces you speak with and ask for her safe passage, easy rest, another great go 'round, and/or what ever your tradition offers.
It's a most powerful reminder that while the last couple of weeks have been bliss (relatively) we are still walking in the forest. Every moment with Shimmy is a gift. Life is more precious than we ever really know.

Here is a video of Simon experiencing being tickled for the first time and sharing a new laugh with us.

Nothing else to say.

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